Whispering the best she could over the loud music she pointed to a poster on the Ladies room door and asked me how much trouble she'd get in if she took off the wall and ... well for lack of a better term -- STOLE IT.
Now I'm not one to let my guests get thrown in jail so I volunteered to get the poster for her. About a foot and a half by two foot the poster was for a musician scheduled to play later in the month.
I went back to my table, waited for a few songs and then calmly walked over opened the women's restroom door, we're talking small one-seater bathrooms here, and while I had it open I popped the poster free from the door. Then I shut it, did what anybody who'd consumed a fair amount of beer would do, flushed and walked out with the poster in my hand. Luckily there was a back door only a few feet away and the thing was propped open to allow for better ventilation. So I walked out deposited the poster in my vehicle and then rejoined my group. All in all a heist in about forty-five seconds. Maybe I can get a part in Ocean's Fifteen or whatever number they are up to now.
What I didn't tell you earlier was that not only is Jeff Campbell a writer, but he also used to be a state policman in New Mexico. So I knowingly committed a theft with an ex cop right there to witness, but what I really want to know is how many of you reading this will be willing to contribute to my bail when the authorities read this blog?