Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Watch it Wiggle, See it Jiggle ...

Some things just have to be blogged about. That being said, tiptoeing through certain minefields can lead to have one's foot blown off, and once a foot is separated from a body there is not telling when that foot wayward foot could wind up smack dab in a blogger's mouth. So today I proceed with caution, because I really do not want to offend, but then again ... some things just beg to be bloggecized. Yep that's right I am creating a new word. Take note Webster, Bloggecized - The act of publicizing information, rude behavior, or head scratching, huh inducing acts of human weirdness. Okay so I'm not adept at writing definitions, but you get the idea.

Used to be I could say what I wanted on this blog without much chance of anyone I actually know reading it. That has changed. I have several family members that read my diatribes, both local and from out of town, Hello Jenny, feel free to chime in with a comment. I have friends from both the writing world and not who read my blog. If I had to hazard a guess I'd speculate that at least forty or fifty people from right here in Amarillo read my blog at least occasionally.

And while Amarillo has a population of 173,627 according to the 2000 census my hometown actually has the feel of a town about one tenth that size. Put ten Amarilloans in room and most likely at least two will know each other. If not you can bet they all know some of the same people, especially if they've lived here their whole lives. Sp there is a goo d chance this blog will get read by someone I wished it wouldn't.

Disclaimers aside, I am obligated to tell y'all about this wedding I just heard about.

I did not actually attend, but my mom did. One of her coworkers son's was the groom. Now my mom is in her early sixties and isn't what anyone would describe as cosmopolitan so sometimes things that are new to her, really are not. Such as?


Jello shots? In case any of you do not know jello shots ate little vials of jello filled with Everclear. Everclear is the closest thing to moonshine you can actually go into a liquor store and buy.


Ever been to a wedding reception that handed out jello shots to sixty year old women at the reception? Me neither? Nothin' says lovin' like vial of rot gut booze and yellow Jello.


But wait folks that is not all. The entire wedding, the bride dress and all was themed after a college sports team. And no it wasn't Texas Longhorn burnt orange. Matter of fact it wasn't even a Texas college. It is a wonder a team most Texans hate. It is a wonder some attendees did not stand up and boo as she walked down the aisle. I would have been tempted. Not because I'm a Longhorn fan, but because the entire weddin' was themed for a team I'd just as Sooner, never won another game.


Now I am a sorts fan, but I'd never plan my whole wedding after a sports teams. I do not know the bride. Maybe she graduated from there, maybe she was an athlete from there, maybe I wouldn't think the whole thing as as bizarre if it wasn't followed up with jello shots.


And for the record, my mom was intrigued by jello shots. I won't be surprised if we don't sit down to Thanksgiving dinner only to have jello shots for dessert. Oh well at least it will spice things up a bit. No. it's not the tryptophan, that's making me sleepy, it's the grain alcohol. And if turkeys are full of tryptophan, and tryptophan makes you sleepy, how come turkeys aren't passed out on the couch all the time?


For more on Jello, visit Beth over at her recently moved Pink Lace and Pearls blog. Turns out my mom isn't the only one intrigued by Jello.

23 comments:

Jenster said...

Bwahahahaha!!! That's a wedding for the society pages for sure!!

alex keto said...

I think it all makes sense and isn't weird at all.
I mean if I had organized my wedding to revolve around a college sports team, you can bet I would have been getting hammered before, during and after the nuptials on grain alcohol, anti-freeze, boot polish, nail remover and anything else that would sit still long enough for me to grab.
But each to his own.

Sherry said...

Oh tacky, tacky!! The bride obviously does not read Martha Stewart who would have a stroke if she heard about this (quick, someone send Martha a link!!!)...seriously...

I have this image of your mother sliding on with jell-o shots and suddenly the sports themed wedding seems "not so bad"...

You'll definitely be having a "happy" Thanksgiving!!

preTzel said...

OMG! The entire scenario was just played out in my head and now I think I need to go use Everclear on my ears to try and clean that scene away! ACK! ACK!

WordVixen said...

Hey, I'm half Sooner! Hold on... brain fart. Sooner is OK, not KS, right?

I've only had Everclear once. It's illegal in PA, but I have friends that get around a lot. They all seemed so disappointed when I drank it like vodka instead of screaming and crying. Weird people. :)

alex keto said...

This post reminds me of the one time I went to a party with grain alcohol. A lot of things happened but the funniest was when someone hopped in the police car sent to break it up and they stole the squad car.

Michelle said...

Sounds like a good old fashioned redneck shindig!!

angel, jr. said...

Too bad you don't have any video of this wedding!!

Jenny said...

So.........if I wasn't reading you would talk about me?

Funny that you bring up Jello Shots - We had a discussion about them Saturday night.

Ello said...

I'm catching up on blogs now that I am back from my mini vaca and am laughing so hard on this one! Jello shots to grannies! I wish I could have seen it, seriously, I would have been crying.

RoxRocks said...

You sure you don't live in Northern Alberta? LOL

AaroN said...

Now that's comedy gold right there.

It was just this year that my brother and I were camping with my Dad (50s) and had the pleasure of explaining many sexual euphemisms such as "pitching a tent." Intertaining indeed.

Bernita said...

I have suddenly realized that I've lived a sheltered life.

Monnik said...

That's funny! What a wedding! Sounds like the bride and groom were two attention-loving folks who wanted people to remember their nuptials for years to come.

I'm dying thinking of your mom serving jello shots at thanksgiving. ha!

Brooke said...

I think we need a few more pictures on this one!

Charles Gramlich said...

Those folks from Oklahoma have no class eh? Lol. Loved the jello shot stuff. man those things are foul though. I'd rather light the alcohol and then drink it rather than take it as a jello shot.

Dawn said...

What strange weddings they have in your part of the world. Sounds like fun. Weird - but fun!

Church Lady said...

Hi Travis,
I appreciated your comment on my sing-along.
You are a most worthy Texan, even if you are hairy (which I don't know. It's just what you say in your title).

I linked you on my blog if that's okay. Can you guess who you are?

;-)

alternatefish said...

I like jello shots. They're like a beautiful combination of childhood and adulthood.

The best are jello buckets though, where everyone just goes after it with a spoon.

WordVixen said...

Aaron- yikes. That reminds me of the time I had to explain to my mother why tongue rings were so popular a few years ago. Then I got yelled at for knowing why.

The Egg said...

Great post! Very funny. Yeah I don't understand the passion with wedding themes. I probably would have been downing those jello shots:)

The Egg said...

Great post! Very funny. Yeah I don't understand the passion with wedding themes. I probably would have been downing those jello shots:)

Bubblewench said...

Nothin' says lovin' like vial of rot gut booze and yellow Jello.

Geez and we just passed around the champagne.

I did let my husband wear his Flyer's tie to our Engagement party, that's about as far as sports got into the wedding.

I wish you had pictures.