Sunday, August 16, 2009

I'm A Twit

I planned on returning to the My Town Monday group today, but things didn't work out right for em to do so. I wanted to announce the publication of a friend of mine's book, but in order to do the post justice I will have to postpone it for a week.

In the meantime and with regards to the fact I'm hard at work on my latest book length project I'm simply going to cut and paste in a few of my most recent twitter messages. Yes, I'm aware that I am slightly off center but I thought y'all might be amused by my 140 character or less observations of my world.

Should you feel so inclined you can follow me on twitter via this link.

I don't even know what TAT is, but given the goods it's normally traded for, it's some mighty valuable stuff.

1 more set of days off before my kids head back to school. I've missed my Thursday and Friday morning writing time.

Against my wishes I'm at the feed trough of humanity. Better known as Furr's Cafeteria.

Rum, hard metal horseshoes, and a very dark backyard do not add up to good things.

My 8yo son just informed me his lifelong dream is to own an electric banjo.

Judging by the content of the blog post I am currently writing, it is clear I am losing my mind.

The plural for doofus? Is it doofuses, or Doofi?

I refuse to follow any man not wearing a shirt in his profile pic. So you 're proud of your six pack. Guess what? I got the whole damn keg.

Would you be inclined to sample a delicacy called ├ęcorce de porc if you knew nothing but the name?

Why is it one day you can feel like a pretty good writer and the very next day feel like an untalented hack?

I like the fact pirates is a trending topic right now, but the fact it ranks lower than Chuck Norris pisses me off.

Papa Hemingway a KGB spy? New book claims so.

Is it possible to wake DOWN? Wake SIDEWAYS? Or must we perpetually wake UP?

My friend Alex Keto recently traveled to Kenya. Read his powerful description here.

Tweet question @writer dad asked, Can anyone think of anything that still just costs a penny? My answer ... A wish in a fountain.

Came into work only to learn one of my coworkers, a friend, died yesterday. Shitty way to begin the day.

So, I come back to work this morning, JULY 5th. And what's my first task? Read a safety sheet on ... JULY 4th hazards. #gov't timeliness

Slept out on the trampoline with my boys last night. Been 20 years since I slept on 1. Will be twice as long before I do it again.

Twit spam is bad enough. Must they call me names? Got this 1 today. "Hey boys! dont know what it is but dorky guys turn me on BIG TIME."

By the way, if you are a writer and do not read GalleyCat everyday. You should be.

Had a freaky dream last night where I was reading my own obit. Least it described me as a successful novelist. And I was old in the pic.

When closing time comes at Home Depot they turn the lights out, whereas at closing time at the bar, they turn them on. #recentobservation

My latest short story is up at Beat To A Pulp. Read it here --

Need more propane for my grill. Where's Hank Hill when you need him?

I was chosen as 1 of the best dad bloggers by Betty Confidential. Check out the article here

Tweeting straight from the dentist's chair as I await deadening shot to take. Wanna swap places?

My tongue now feels like a bloated sponge. I shall name it Bob. #dentalfun

Not counting replies and ReTweets that is the bulk of my tweet messages for the last two months. See what fun you are missing by not partaking in the charms of Twitter. Okay maybe not.


Jenn Jilks said...

You're a twit, fer shurr.
And we love reading them! You have a huge following for someone who can just twit! I envy your twitness. I recall writing a 9,000 word essay for some degree or other. It is harder to be succinct! Good on ya!

Teresa said...

Love your twits, Travis. Are you now called Travis the Tweeting Twit? Look forward to an MTM from you when you have the time.

Mango Girl said...

Love the randomness of twittering. I tried it way back when, but I simply can't keep up with that, the blog, the facebook thing, keeping my orders straight, etc. I have simply run out of time.

You can do it for me! Thanks.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

There's some good one-liners among your tweets, LOL!

Being Beth said...

I'm still trying to figure out what a TAT is.

I find it hard to keep up with everything online plus my writing, but I do make a point to go to your twitter page daily to read your twits.

You are one funny guy!

G said...


I ain't missing one dadgummed thingy by not partaking in twitter.

Besides, if I want to get fired from work, twitter will be the way to go though.

Rick said...

Absolutely hilarious, Travis. Made my whole night!

DrillerAA09 said...

Will I need a GPS to follow you on twitter? The random thoughts are great.

Charles Gramlich said...

I could imagine a trampoline would be a bit...sticky under ones flesh.

mo.stoneskin said...

The plural of "doofus" has to be "doofi", it just feels right.

Melanie Avila said...

I'm sorry about your friend. :(

The rest of these crack me up. I vote for doofuses because the word just calls for it (and spellcheck didn't correct it).

Tell Bob hello.

Eric said...

You are so hilarious. You really ought to just put out an ebook or something entitled 'Random Thoughts By Travis'. It would sell millions. Promise.

Terrie Farley Moran said...

Hi Travis,

Great tweeting, but I am a bit irritated that you neglected to share on Twitter the info on the great bra sale that you shareed with James lincoln Warren. ;)


Lazy Writer said...

What in the heck is a TAT? And I abhor the dentist, so no, I don't want to trade places with you.

angel, jr. said...

Those are fun twits...I could follow those twits, no like some of the nonsense ones that are out there.

Natasha Fondren said...

I love your tweets, Travis! I only login now and then, but I always go to your page and catch up on all of them.

alex keto said...

I liked the tweet about reading the obit. At least you were old and successful when you died. Beats the alternatives.

Kathryn Magendie said...

"Is it possible to wake DOWN? Wake SIDEWAYS? Or must we perpetually wake UP?"


Lana Gramlich said...

An electric banjo??? *ROFL* I love it!

Phats said...

I feel honored i get to read your tweets when they first come out :)

the walking man said...

I just don't understand the appeal of twits tweeting. Is the prize found in doing it in the 140 chrctr lmt?

Mr. Shife said...

I am still a newby in the Twitter universe but I am not sure if I am sold on it yet. It had some initial appeal but now I am kind of blah about it. BTW your comment on my bear shirt post was quite hilarious. Take it easy.

Sharla said...

You received an award on my blog...btw...go check it out!! :)

Cloudia said...

I enjoy your posts, tweets, WHATEVER. You're kind of the Doofi!!
Aloha ha ha

Comfort Spiral

tina said...

Hello there. Saw you over on Shife's blog...think I've seen you around for sometime. You may have seen me writing here and there too. I just moved to the panhandle of Texas 3 weeks ago today. So, howdy neighbor :)

Beth said...

Love your Twitters.
Your post has me (almost) tempted to start Twittering...

Alyssa Goodnight said...

I don't Twitter (or tweet), but I found this very entertaining. And I've often wondered about that doofus question myself...

Chris Eldin said...

Liked your obit.

Junosmom said...

Eh, I'm trying to once in awhile Twit, but I tend to do more Facebooking. Manly to see what my friends are up to, and watch my girls. Have to watch out for green bandanna men.

Sam said...

Oh dear - more social networking for me to join so I can procrastinate better! Between blogs and Facebook, and no twitter, I will be seriously swamped with socials.
How to focus??