Tuesday, August 11, 2009

RSVP Now ; Before It's Too Late

Lots of people dread turning 40. Many go so far as to lie and claim to be 39 year after year. I perhaps have the best reason ever to dread my 40th. No, I don't turn the big FOUR OH anytime soon. Not for more than three years as a matter of fact. So you might be asking yourself. Why the hell is Travis rambling on about something so far away.

Hold your damn horses. I'll get there in a minute.

This whole post is inspired by the fact my wife and I went to the movies the other night. We saw the latest Harry Potter movie and before I say anything else I will say I thought it was probably the best movie adaptation of the series thus far. I did come away with a few observations.

Is it just me or does Hogwarts caretaker Filch closely resemble the King of Texas, legendary Outlaw and true Texas hero Willie Nelson? You decide.

Those aren't the two best comparison shots but the first time Filch showed up in Harry potter and The Half Blood Prince I actually thought for half a second, What the heck is Willie doing in the movie.

And that wasn't my only observance.


I do believe if you took NFL star quarterback Peyton manning, a bottle of peroxide, and a magic wand you could easily turn him into Draco Malfoy. Again not the best comparison photos.

But this post isn't about lookalikes. Remember it's about my 40th birthday.

So before the Harry Potter they showed a trailer for a new movie. This movie is called 2012 and is about the end of times. In case you are unaware the Mayan calender stops abruptly on December 21st, 2012.

December 21st is also the winter solstice. According to the lore of fantasy books and what not it is the day the worlds most powerful wizards are born on. But of course only if they are the 7th son of a 7th son.

If a baby born on December 21st is merely the first son of a first son they grow up to be big hairy bloggers. Least that is how it worked out for me. yes I was born on December 21st. December 21st of 1972 which according to the Mayans means that come my 40th birthday -- the world will cease to exist.

Talk about a reason to dread turning forty. I mean a bad day is one thing, but the end of days? Doesn't get much worse than that. And guess what? 12-21-2012 falls on a Friday. Seems to me the word should at least wait until Monday to say piss on it, I've had enough.

Here's my take -- I don't buy any of that apocalyptic prediction crap. I say the Mayan dude in charge of calendar building got lazy and said, "Why the hell should I keep going past 2012? It ain't like I'll be around to see it." Then when his supervisor audited his work he came up with some cockamamie story about the sun passing close to the equator and the world erupting into a fiery ball.

And I'm so sure of it, I'm gonna have one hell of a 40th birthday bash on 12-21-2012 even if I have to plan the thing myself. Come 12-22-2012 all of my buddies may feel like the end of times but I'm certain that will have more to do with the rum than the Mayans. And yes, all of you are invited.

Who knows? Maybe we can even get Willie to show up and play.

38 comments:

Beth said...

gee.....40 was such a long time ago for me...I don't really remember a whole lot about it. old age does that to a person.

Junosmom said...

The numbers seem to be significant, 12-21-12. Forward, backward, forward. And then, of course, your birthday and you turn 40. I venture to say the world you know NOW will cease to exist, or at least change a little. Just speaking from experience and the chance ache and pain.

Erica Orloff said...

I hope I get an invite! :-)

LOL! As usual, one of your hilarious observations.
E

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Great post, LOL! And I agree with your theory about the Mayan slacker who knocked off at 2012. I always suspected as much!

March to the Sea said...

12-12-2012..i'll mark it down and I will be 42.5..bah.

Charles Gramlich said...

I guess if the world ends it'll be your fault. but then, there'll be no one left around tlame you.

Party on!

Laura K. Curtis said...

If you like rum, let me offer a couple recipes for you. Each of these needs to be made about a month in advance, so the flavors can soak.

Take dark rum and add sugar in a proportion of 1 part sugar to 2 parts rum. Then add either:

1 banana cut in half lengthwise and 2 vanilla beans, also cut in half lengthwise to expose the interior as much as possible.

OR

1 orange, sliced, and lots of chunks of ginger.

Either of these makes a delicious sipping drink poured over ice, or a quick and delicious shot.

Bottoms up!

AirmanMom said...

I'm looking forward to my invitation!!!!
See ya there!
~AM

caroleesherwood said...

i got excited when i first heard about the world ending in 2012 (i heard about it initially when i was at the hair dresser, you know, THE source of all important information). i got excited b/c i am also scheduled to turn 40 in 2012, and i was hoping the world would end before that sad day comes. but then i did the research and you're right: it's december. your birthday. i turn 40 in july 2012, so there's no hope for me. you, at least, still have a shot!

Monnik said...

Cool! And I do think that Malfoy looks like Payton Manning!

We saw the Harry Potter movie on vacation at a Drive In and I wasn't able to hear all that well, so I'll need to see it again to see how much I liked it.

I hope we ALL have a great time on your 40th birthday!!

Lissa :]] said...

I've never dreaded a birthday, in fact I LOVE them, but I can see where there might be a touch of apprehension about your 40th. Damn those Mayans!!

I say we have some fun and abruptly end a calendar just to spook people a zillion years from now!!

G said...

Crap, you're only 37?

That means I got seven years on ya big guy.

And that really means that by the time you turn forty I'll be knocking on the door to the big 50...er...um....47.

Deborah said...

Count me in. You already know what a great dancer I am. You & me and the Cotton-eye Joe. LOL Okay, you can stop laughing now and pass the rum.

dizzblnd said...

I could see the comparisons. I have a great imagination. I can't get into HP.

I discovered I am older than you by 9 months almost to the day That means your parents were doing it when I was born ewwwwwwww. Sorry.


I am not sure what to think about the whole end of the world theory. If it is still around, I am definitely coming to your party!

Hit 40 said...

I have heard this theory that they dude making the calender either quit or got sacrificed? Your idea to party like it is 1999 again is rock solid!! I'll bring some liquor.

Jennifer said...

Travis, I can't think of a better way to end it all than drinking rum at your 40th! Count me in....

Nicole said...

I forget that Isaiah shares his birthday with you. Hard to believe he'll be turning 6 when you hit 40... Hopefully he'll get to finish his kindergarten year!!

lonelypond said...

Heck, I may come to Texas for that.

EriCan said...

Great post! I'm an end-of-the-world film junkie. I can't wait to see that movie. Yes, I totally believe your theory about the Myan calendar guy saying screw this.

I think it's pretty cool that your fortieth is on that day. Party it up!! I was born on Easter, doesn't quite have the same party vibe yours does. I still have eight more years till my 40th, if I make it past your birthday that is... :)

Sharla said...

Hmmm...so I'll be 45 when the world ends, and my daughter will be 5 months shy of graduating high school. Well that just bites! So she ought to just float through school instead of working for college.

Melissa Marsh said...

That should be one heckuva b'day party!

Avery DeBow said...

I agree about the Mayan dude. You gotta stop counting somewhere, right? Might as well make it on a significant date (solstice). By the way, that 2012 movie preview--despite all the explosions, meteors, floods--bored the snot out of me.

I say party. And if you can get Willie OR Filch to show up, I'd call it a good day.

Melanie Avila said...

OMG, only you. :)

Kathryn Magendie said...

laughing!>....

Gawd! Forty is Nuttin'! 50 was really weird.....I may have cried, then I got over it *laugh*

Janet said...

OK, you've got three years to plan the most fantastic theme party. Only apocalyptic costumes allowed: meteorites, anti-Christs, exploding suns, nuclear bombs... It will be a blast.

sybil law said...

I am SO there for your 40th party. It would be AWESOME to get Willie there, eh?!
(This was a hilarious post!)

Clare2e said...

Travis- First, I must vouch for- and copy down- Laura's party rum recipes. They are so delectable, you can't believe it, and I'm not even the hugest rum fan. The prep sounds simple, but the result I've tapped from those glass jars is nectar of the gods.

Unless you get one of those pesky restraining orders I'm always bothered with, I'll be at your party! The other guy I know having one is having his 2012 shindig in Thailand. Lovely, to be sure, but I'm not sure I'll be able to swing the airfare. BBQ-calypse I can do.

the walking man said...

Actually 12-21-12 is astrologically significant because the stars align in the 13th (hidden) sign of the sky's zodiac.

It doesn't mean the end of times but rather the beginning of new times...like you turning forty young 'un. '72 by damn that was the year I enlisted.

pattinase (abbott) said...

My son turns 40 next year and he dreads it. Now it seems like childhood to me.

Bina said...

Holy Crap! That guy DOES look like Willie! Amazing.

This whole Mayan thing freaks me out, but then I think "Well hell, I don't believe that" and then I think "But what if I'm wrong??"

And if MY 40th birthday were on that day, it wold freak me out even more! I'd like to come to that part. I mean, if the Mayan's are right, at least I'd be drunk!

"And so our stories go..." said...

40? Easy, piesie. Age is just a number.
Mary

Suzanne said...

Why the hell is Willy Nelson holding my cat Mickey? I don't recall giving written consent for that.

I just turn 50, so shut TFU about 40. Kids. *Bunch of f****** sissies.* I'll see you at 60 mister.

You must visit "Otin." You can find him on my comment page or on my side bar right near your name. Why? Because look at the avatar. I knew you, then met him and nearly died!!! I think you should meet. He's probably your long lost twin. Yes, you're welcome. I love you too.

XO

Barbara Martin said...

Forty is nothing, Travis. The aches and pains haven't started yet.

Shelli said...

your funny.

Shelli said...

your funny.

otin said...

Got to love Willie Nelson! I hated turning 40, and now am pushing 44! GRRRRRR!

Andi said...

Wow, I am approaching 40 in 4 months, but without a "cool" story like that it will be just another day. What a way to go out, better have one hell of a party!

Lana Gramlich said...

I knew there was something...apocalyptic about you! (BTW, 40's not so bad. Personally I had a harder time turning 38, for some reason.)