Friday, November 11, 2011

Booze Hound

I spotted this Lost and Found ad in my local paper yesterday and I simply had to share it.

Don't get me wrong, it's sad for anyone to lose a pet, but let's break down the this ad.

1) Is it ever wise to take your pet to the bar? Now the ad doesn't specify what they mean by taken. You see this particular bar is on 6th street here in Amarillo. 6th street is part of old Route 66 and this particular section of the road is an eclectic mix of antique stores, restaurants, nigh club, entertainment venues, and tattoo parlors. Several nightclubs allow dogs in the bar and there is a joint called the No Dogs Allowed Saloon nearby. So was this pooch left in an unlocked vehicle or was it curled beneath its owners stool? If the former then it is my belief the owner should have been smarter but if it is the latter than i gotta say it's a pretty low person who will steal a person's dog while they are drinking. Thought that does raise the question how drunk does a person have to be to not notice someone carrying off the canine beneath your seat?

2) I know crooks are dumb, but if you are gonna steal a dog why would you thieve a one-eyed one? Unless you yourself are a pirate and want a pet with a matching eye-patch I don't get this one. Of course my friend Lissa could be involved. She has a track history with one-eyed critters.

3) Why when describing a lost pet would you bother to include spayed? These ads cost by the word and given the fact that with some exploratory probing a person can not verify this information gotta say this was a wasted dime. If I;m going to waste cash by tossing in an extra word I;m gonna get my money;s worth and use something fun like onamonapia. Oh come on, don;t act like you enjoy the way onamonapia whishes off the tongue.

4) Pretty Girl? For a dog name? I don't like it. Maybe a parrot which leads back to my earlier pirate theory.

5) For any of you treasure seekers out there don't get to excited. I've been to Lowery's and frankly I';m rather skeptical any of the clientele there has five hundred smackers to be throwing around.


In other news my promotional blog tour for THE FEEDSTORE CHRONICLES is on going. Monday I was in Germany, today Canada where the ever gracious Beth Stewart let me surprise her readers. Hope on over and join the discussion.

And if you missed Stop 1 on the tour you can still check it out as well.


Old Kitty said...

I hope Pretty Girl (it's a sweet name!! Yes it is!!!) is found soon and reunited with her owner - whom I hope will never bring her to any bar any time soon! Take care

Beth said...

How did whoever write the ad know the dog was taken? Maybe Pretty Girl had had enough of hanging around a bar and simply walked out.

Either way, hope she's found!

WordVixen said...

I'm thinking a lot like Beth right now... But, and I may be giving the owner too much credit, but s/he may have included "spayed" to try and convince the thief that it's not worth keeping the dog for breeding purposes.


think maybe he was so drunk he just lost his girlfriend?

the walking man said...

What makes you think it was the owner drinking at the bar...dogs can't drive well and maybe the owner was the designated driver for the little bitch and she got her one eyed self drunk, picked up by a mastiff and hasn't wanted to come home yet.

Charles Gramlich said...

I guess it was the person's seeing "eye" dog.

Travis Erwin said...

I like the walking man theory best. Beth had the same idea but walking man expounded upon where she went.

Tyhitia Green said...

I hope the person finds the dog, but your thoughts were hilarious, Travis. :D

My word verification is quart. LOL. Just sayin'.

DrillerAA09 said...

I had exactly the same thought when I read "spayed" in the would you know.