Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Proof, my elevator doesn't reach the top floor. - Terrible Tuesdays with Travis

Let me be the first to announce, I AM OFFICIALLY A JACKASS.


I had another story in mind for today's' terrible Tuesday episode, but something happened at lunch that made me decide to bring you a fresh tale only hours afterwards.


Okay I have blogged about the weird people and strange happening here at postal school. Remember the tin foil hat guy? But I do not let a few wackos change who I am. I still talk to people on the elevator. Matter a fact I'm the type of person who strikes up conversations with total strangers all the time. Elevators, grocery store lines, park benches. You name it. I wish a had a dollar for every time my wife has walked up while I'm in the midst of a conversation and then later say who was that? I usually respond with "Not a clue but he seemed nice," to which she'll roll her eyes and say You'll talk to anybody.


So there I was today riding an empty elevator when a guy gets on. I say something to the effect of "How's it going?"


He nods but says nothing, then promptly begins to stare at his toes.


I say, "How long is your class?"

No response.

I try again a bit louder, "What class are you taking?"

Nothing.

So I take the initiative. "I'm in IJP class. It's boring as hell but at least we get out early."

Still nothing. So as we get t the bottom floor I decide to have some fun. I nmena why not? My attempts to be nice had been as well received as a fart in a ... well an elevator.


"Well it's been nice talking at you. It's not often you find a friendly people here in Oklahoma."

He looks up as I'm talking and kind of frowns as we step off the elevator.


Halfway down the hall he stops and begins communicating with another guy -- In sign language.


Suddenly I felt like a jackass for thinking the guy was simply a jerk. I hope there is no karmic justice for my bad thoughts since I plan to hit the casino in a couple of hours and try my hand at a bit o' Texas Hold 'Em.


Wonder how you sign, Hello, my name is Travis and I'm an idiot?

31 comments:

*Tyler* said...

Oh Travis~
Well, I am sorry to say that we did not meet this summer at conference, though we have mutual friends. Anyhow, I am laughing so hard right now! Sounds like something I would do.

preTzel said...

Is it terrible that I am laughing? I am you know! Thanks for the laugh, especially at a time when I needed one. :)

Katrina said...

Did you notice the camera in the elevator? You didn't? The USPS was testing you? And since you flunked--tomorrow's class will be on sign language. Why? Because you never know when you may need it to fix those machines. They have been reprogramed to no longer understand that one middle finger.

Angie said...

Ouch. [wince] Yeah, definitely embarassing. At least the deaf guy himself probably had no idea you were talking to him, much less that you took a jab at him there at the end. That sort of behavior is much easier to take, at least for me, if I'm the only one who knows I did something jerkish. (Or at least, if I can decide who to tell the story on myself. :) )

Angie

sybil law said...

I think if you'd just made that "L" sign with your hand to your forehead - that would've sufficed.
Kidding!
No - that's just funny!
Maybe a fart next time would get a better response!

Chick said...

He could have let you know in a non verbal way that he was deaf...I'm just saying...even deaf guys can be morons...will I go to hell for saying that?

Chick said...

What??? A little non hearing humor (definitely going to hell now).

B.E. Sanderson said...

Naw, I don't think you're a jerk. Since the guy was shooting you looks, he could plainly see you were talking to him, so he should've made some non-verbal cue that he couldn't hear you. Then you could've mouthed 'I'm sorry' - which I'm sure you would've done. Being disabled doesn't give someone a pass from being courteous.

Rocketstar said...

Yeah, that sucks. Maybe let non-responsive elevator people lie.

David said...

That doesn't make you a jerk. It was just an unfortunate happenstance.

And I agree that the deaf guy should have tried to let you know somehow. I don't know what the right way would be, but there must be something that would have worked.

AaroN said...

I think that's a pointer and thumb in the shape of an "L" against your forhead, Travis. :D

Brooke said...

Oooh...that one had to sting. Well, take heart, you were the only witness to your mortification.

Shauna said...

ROTFL! So funny!

Charles Gramlich said...

All I can say is, "oops." Not a particular feel good moment.

Frank Baron said...

Travis, this kind of story always evokes the same thought: Better you than me buddy. :)

The Duck said...

In case you were actually interested in how to at least spell out "Hello, my name is Travis and I am an idiot" in sign language, here you go.

You're welcome buddy.

Merry Jelinek said...

Oh, I wouldn't blame the deaf guy - I can't tell you how many times someone was talking to me and I didn't notice - and I hear just fine...

At least you only verbally insulted him - think how much worse you'd feel if you flipped him off... :-)

jenn said...

Ohh Travis, Travis, Travis. You are such a nice guy. It does not bother me that you talk to perfect strangers. It is the fact they end up telling you their whole life story. They tell you about some crazy rash. What they have been doing for the last 10 years. It is wierd what people tell you.

I am sure he would have told you about rashes as well. He just knew you would not understand. Maybe he did not want you to feel bad. He had to have known you were talking. I have never seen you talk without your arms and hands flailing about. He probably thought you were telling him about your rash. hahaha.

Vesper said...

Ouch, Travis! But, hey, don't feel too bad - you said he was staring at his toes so maybe...
I like how you told this story - very vividly.
Thank you for visiting my blog!

Lexi said...

Ouch!

Patti said...

nice one...gulp.

oh, i linked you...yeah i dd.

Jenster said...

Um, I can teach you to say, "yellow bird" or "more, please". That help??

A Paperback Writer said...

I agree with those who think the guy should've indicated he couldn't hear you when he looked at you and saw you talking to him. Really, that was as rude as anything you said to him. Let's just hope he didn't see your lips when you made the really sarcastic remarks.
On the other hand, maybe he really could hear and could also use ASL and was just trying to bug you. Maybe he's been telling all his friends about this ever since.
I have folk danced for 30 years, and the director of one of my groups speaks fluent Russian. More than once, when he's been in a Polish or Russian costume in a public place, he's pretended not to speak English to some poor store clerk, making him/her count out his change for a coffee or the like -- then saying "Hey thanks. See ya." afterwards and laughing like crazy. You never know; maybe the guy on the elevator was like that. (Probably not, but it's a fun thought.)

Clare2e said...

Ahh, but what a story you got out of it. Comedy Gold!

Roxan said...

Don't be so hard on yourself. I've had jobs where I've had to deal with deaf people and when they look at everything but you, it is difficult to communicate with them.
I also have deaf family members who don't go around looking at the ground, they want to know what's going on.

Sam said...

LOL - sorry, I shouldn't laugh. I had a friend whose sister was deaf & she wasn't shy about letting people know she couldn't hear - if you spoke to her, she'd respond right away with sign language. I don't think you're an ass for trying to be friendly. I wish more people were more friendly!

Alicia said...

Ooooh.
Unfortunate, yet funny.
:)

kim said...

That's a free pass. He didn't hear a word and you got a reminder not to make assumptions.

That person is probably at home blogging about being in an elevator with some hearing guy and how he wanted to convey he was deaf, but by the time he thought of it, too much time had passed and the whole thing was awkward and thank God George was there when he got off the elevator...

Bluefingers said...

I think I am shooting shiner bock out my nose right about now...

OMG.

I would have paid to be there.

Yours,


Me

Phats said...

OOPS! hahhaha

Lesson learned right?

Chunks said...

Classic!