Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Messin' With Texas

Outlaw one day.

Law abiding citizen the next.

Yes it is possible, especially if you live here in Texas.

You see today you would get a ticket for revving up your engine and doing 85 down the highway. But tomorrow Texas raises its maximum speed limit to 85. The fastest of any state.



But the ability to put the petal to the metal isn't the only new thing a Texan can do tomorrow.

No siree. September 1st also marks the first day you can hop aboard a helicopter and legally shoot feral hogs from the air. I'm fairly ambivalent on this new law. Texas does have a hog problem, but it's not like the average Joe has the means to fly about popping a cap in Porky's ham. And I'm no fan of shooting animals and leaving them lay. Especially when we are talking about animals that contain lots of tasty bacon.

And still the new fangled fun doesn't stop because starting MaƱana, a Texan can noodle without threat of fine.

Thanks to Animal Planets new show, Hillbilly Handfishing the "sport" of noodling is a bit more well known. For those in the dark noodling is the act of diving and or reaching under water to catch catfish, by hand. Now when you jab your hand into  these unseen holes you really don't know if it will contain a water moccasin, snapping turtle or what.

Now I'm not sure how many states allow noodling but the activity is most commonly associated with Oklahoma and it goes against this Texan's grain to adopt any practice that was though up by, or heavily engaged by Okies.



Besides, I can afford a fishing pole.

And I've grown quite fond of all ten of my fingers.

And if a sport wants to be considered a sport it needs a better name than noodling. Are you listening Curling?

Actually now that I think about it noodling and curling sound as if they belong together. Like twigs and berries. Or frank and beans.

If hillbilly activities like noodling and shooting hogs from choppers (okay I admit the latter is for rich hillbillies but hillbillies none the less) catches on here in Texas I got a feeling more out-of-staters, or foreigners as we prefer to call them, will be happy to speed right through the state.



12 comments:

Melanie Hooyenga said...

Best line I've read today:

...but it's not like the average Joe has the means to fly about popping a cap in Porky's ham.

Now I want to drive in Texas. :)

Rocketstar said...

Wow, 85. We have 75 here but 85, that is pretty damn fast. Tire blows and ... interesting. If it was only I that I had to think about.

Hilary said...

"Are you listening, Curling?" totally cracked me up. You Texans are.. amusing. :)

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Don't mess with Texas? Don't mess with Curling!

G said...

85?

That is so insane. When I was driving through the midwest back in the early part of the last decade, Nebraska's speed limit was 75 and I was white knuckling my steering wheel all the way through to Colorado.

the walking man said...

Gas must be cheap as wild pork belly down there in Perryville either that or fuel taxes are extremely high. Or is that the speed limit only for them escaping off death row from TDJC? Way to go Rick you got my vote...to stay the hell in Texas.

Old Kitty said...

Noodling? Curling is a fine sport but noodling is what one has with stir fry veg and sweet and sour sauce. :-)

take care
x

jadedj said...

So, road kill is now considered fast food in Texas?

Warren Baldwin said...

Gotta love Texas!

Charles Gramlich said...

I've seen too many snakes in the water to even attempt noodling. I prefer the old fashioned way of fishing, with a pole.

With that had been the speed limit when we went through Texas for our trip this summer. And went through TExas. and Went through Texas.

Phats said...

85?? WOW!!

You ready for some football, I think you'll like my Nebraska pick

DrillerAA09 said...

At 85, there will be more tickets issued for exceeding 100 than ever before.
I am Sooner born and Sooner bred, but you can have noodling. I'll keep my fingers, thank you very much.