Friday, February 15, 2013

Taking a Stand

So there I was, standing, conducting my business when it struck me just how unoriginal and predictable we men are.

How else to you explain the word urinal.


Urinals are manly domain. I suppose a daring woman could perfect a leaning hover move and use one in certain circumstances but their back would get wet at the very least. Now we men are quite proud of our ability to stand and piss at the same time, but our multitasking ability seems to end there. Apparently, we are unable to use our brains as well. Perhaps we simply are incapable of thinking while holding our junk.

How else do you explain an asinine term like urinal. Sure it beats the urinator, but not by much.

The word urinal certainly does not compare with toilet, loo, bidet. And your regular unisex plumbing fixture carry a plethora of nicknames crapper, the head, porcelain throne, john, privy, the can and so forth. But if there are other terms for the urinal I'm unaware. (In recollection I did once hear a drunk man call one a piss trough but that was on relation tot he thing below and not what I'd call a true urinal)


I could diverge here and wax on poetically about the joys of gathering with a variety of drunken sports fans to piss together into a glorified bathtub, but I'm not. You men have already experienced this brand of camaraderie and you women will only shake your head. Come to think of it that is the final step in the prcess for men as well.

Moving on.

I am still baffled that we can have urinals like these ...






... and still not have a better word.

Sad thing even as a writer my imagination fails me at the moment.



9 comments:

Debra She Who Seeks said...

They built a new hockey arena in Winnipeg and when they tore down the old one, they sold the seats and fixtures as souvenirs to fans. Yes, someone bought the piss trough. And was happy to get it!

Karin Huddleston said...

When we were in Dallas last September, my husband insisted on going to eat at a place called Redneck Heaven. As our food arrived, and he'd a few beers before hand, he excused himself to go to the restroom. Just as I bit into my monkey snot burger, I see James grinning from ear to ear and waving at me from the restroom.the bathroom had peepholes about the urinals.

It was rather disturbing...

Karin Huddleston said...

nice to see a post from you by the way...

Mark Terry said...

God, forbid, but this blog post reminds me of, I believe it was in Solomon V. Lord by Paul Levine, where the main character's precocious 11-year-old nephew starts spouting names for penis in alphabetical order. Or was it phrases for sex? Might have been a different book.

Charles Gramlich said...

I don't suppose I have given it a lot of thought. I believe I will now.

Aleta said...

OMG, you have me laughing and those last couple of pictures - that's great. Hey, at least there's some creativity in it. I just recently read a blog by a man who was convinced by his wife to pee sitting down (it was in exchange of - if you pee standing, you get to clean it).. suddenly sitting was worth it.

Cloudia said...

your imagination is anything but failing! what a divine madness!

Thanks much for visiting.
I still think of you when I see the dudes maintaining my Waikiki PO.



ALOHA from Honolulu!
Comfort Spiral
~ > < } } ( ° > <3

Phats said...

some of those urinals are awesome haha. When I first started I thought did he take a picture of the pissers and what if someone walks in? haha

the walking man said...

Urinal=YOUR aim is to get it IN here AL! It was in vented by his wife who was tired of sitting on wet boards in the out house.